Don’t Get Used To It

Have you ever stared at a picture of someone you haven’t seen in a long time? I often find myself staring at pictures of my dad trying with everything inside of me to remember that moment and then it hits me. Reality hits me. It’s the strangest feeling ever and I more times than not utter the words “Daddy” as my eyes fill with tears. It’s become so normal. It’s become my every day. My dad isn’t here. But that’s my dad. It’s so strange, but I no longer think about how weird it is to not have a dad. I don’t feel like the weird girl without a dad anymore. It’s just who I am. I have forgotten how it feels to have a dad. I have no clue! I don’t know how it feels to be in middle school, or high school, or college with a dad. I don’t know how it feels to have my dad protect me from boys or hug me when my best friends are mean to me (even if he doesn’t understand the girl drama). I don’t know how it feels to have my dad see me off to a dance or a date or the first day of high school. I don’t know how it feels to learn to drive with my dad or pass my driver’s test with him. But I don’t even think about it. It’s normal to me. I kind of hate that. I hate not even thinking it’s weird that I don’t know how it feels. I mean until I sit down and stare at the pictures. But what can you miss if you don’t know how it feels? If my dad were here, I wouldn’t go a day without talking to him. I’d hug him every chance I got and I’ve never leave him without saying I love you. “What I’d give for one more day with you.” Next month it will be nine years since I’ve seen my dad. It’s been nine years since I’ve heard his voice, felt his hug, kissed his cheek. Nine years since I’ve been able to tell him how much I love him. Reality. I’m twenty years old, I’m supposed to have my dad. But it just doesn’t hit me every day. I’m used to it.

Have you ever been in church and just not felt anything? It’s just another Sunday at church, same songs, same pastor, same message, same people, same seats, same everything.. Nothing is different than the week before? RUN! Where? To the Word of God! When you are pursuing Christ in an every day relationship, it’s not boring! It’s not normal! It’s not every day!! You are growing and changing every day. You are getting closer to Christ every day!!! Going a week without seeing or talking to your spouse or your absolute best friend in the whole wide world or nine years to your dad is CRAZY and nobody does it on purpose! How could you catch up on a whole week with your spouse once a week for a hour? It doesn’t happen!! Even if you only meet once a week with your best friend, I bet you anything you talk to him or her every day or close. You see what I’m saying? You can’t expect to have a living, breathing, exciting, growing, changing, full of life relationship with God if you don’t talk to Him every day, if you don’t read His word every day, and you just go to church for an hour on Sundays or maybe an hour on Wednesdays too. Don’t get caught up in the normal and the every week. God doesn’t call us to have a normal relationship with Him. He calls us to be RADICAL! He doesn’t call us to be comfortable!!!! If you don’t feel anything different about God than you did yesterday or last week or last year or when you were in high school, you need to spice up your relationship. Seek Him EVERY DAY! Don’t lose the blessings of knowing Him by just going to church and doing the same thing every day, doing the same thing every week. If you’re a Christian, you have the least boring life in the whole entire world!! Following God and being in His will is the MOST exciting, thrill seeking, out of (my) control, chaotic, fun, life changing journey I’ve ever been on! I never get used to it!! It’s never normal! It’s never an every day, boring, routine. Yeah I might read my Bible every day, same time, same place, same version but He surprises me every day. Seriously every day. And when I am starting to get comfortable, HA God puts me right back in my place.. uncomfortable and different! Don’t get used to it!! Don’t forget how it feels! He is never changing but we are always changing! He loves us SO MUCH, don’t ever forget that! Don’t ever forget how it feels to be loved by your Heavenly Father. It’s the most amazing feeling in the entire world! He loves us just the way we are but He loves us enough to not keep us that way!!!

My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” John 10:10

Xo Amy

One thought on “Don’t Get Used To It

  1. An interesting discussion is definitely worth comment.
    I think that you should write more on this topic, it may not be a taboo matter but generally folks don’t talk about these issues. To the next! Best wishes!!

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